Only You Can Save Yourself
Five shopaholics reveal their purchasing habits
Dear Reader,
If you have been keeping up with this column, you might know that at Occasional Obsessions, we are very aware of the driver behind our ability to discover new brands: an interest in fashion bordering on obsession. From finding the most exciting jewellery makers in the region to fashion adjacent video art, we want to bring you the best that Southeast Asia has to offer.
It goes from discovery (wow I love this) to denial (I do not need this) to anger (why can’t I control myself?) then bargaining (it is a great investment), depression (I am a shopaholic) and finally going in for the purchase: acceptance. The owning of a fashion object is tied closely to the thrill of the hunt, finding an obscure, one-of-a-kind piece, or simply completing a look inspired by something we saw, so we can look good and up-to-date. Fashion is a game of desire and retail is an emotional business.
In this edition of Occasional Obsessions, we ask fellow shopaholics about their purchasing habits. Perhaps with some reflection, we can learn to shop mindfully for the rest of 2025.
Pamela, 22
Artist Assistant Manager
Pamela’s most recent purchase, a handbag that looks like a football. Image courtesy of the interviewee.
What has been a recent item you have been coveting?
I have been drawn to sequinned pieces the past year. I already own a silver sequinned bag, a pair of sequinned shorts, and a holographic sequinned top. Now, I feel like I am missing shoes to complete a “collection”. While I do not have a clear idea of what sequinned shoes would look like, I think they would make an interesting addition to my wardrobe.
Please describe your shopping habits.
When I was younger, I was frugal due to my family’s financial situation. Later, I discovered thrifting and even started a thrift shop on Instagram, selling preloved clothes and sourcing unique pieces from family members. I started visiting thrift shops weekly. The affordable prices and the thrill of finding one-of-a-kind items made shopping irresistible, and over time, I started buying something nearly every time I thrifted.
What measures have you put in place to control your spending?
I used to track my expenses with an app called Seedly, where I recorded every purchase. However, I eventually stopped because I found myself using loopholes, like paying in cash from savings, to avoid confronting the reality of my spending.
What measures have worked, and what has not?
As I have matured and started working in professional settings, my style has naturally shifted. I have begun investing in versatile wardrobe staples that suit my work environment. This transition has led me to shop less frequently but focus on higher-quality pieces within my financial means.
Strategies like deleting shopping apps like Taobao and Carousell have not been as effective. They did not reduce my desire to shop; I simply shifted to physical stores instead.
Do you think you will stop anytime soon?
I do not think so. I have a lot of wants, especially for unique items that allow me to express myself fully. My style varies dramatically based on my mood, ranging from feminine frilly skirts to androgynous suits. Feeling comfortable and authentic in what I wear is a priority for me. Ultimately, I aspire to build a dream closet—a space where I can rotate an extensive collection of clothes that match my evolving style. For now, shopping remains a way for me to achieve that vision and keep my wardrobe dynamic.
Juni, 32
Artist
Juni’s most recent purchase, press-on nails from Bangkok-based nail salon Nail.o1. Image courtesy of the interviewee.
I have been coveting a lot of summer tops lately. I have tons of items saved on my online shopping app and waiting to checkout when a sale hits. I have also archived a bunch of styling outfits and clothes on Instagram. Barbara Kruger’s art piece “I shop…therefore I am” really resonates with me.
I try to keep a maximum budget for spending and try to get rid of clothing by selling them online, or giving away some each month.
Honestly though, when I travel it becomes way easier to pass my hard limit. I like to consider it a form of investment as I think accessing which items suit you well is a great form of self expression.
Axel, 30
Something related to the crypto industry
What has been a recent item you have been coveting?
Raf Simons A/W '01 Combat Belt.
Please describe your shopping habits.
Regularly, quickly and effectively.
Why do you think you shop so much?
I am fashionable.
What measures have you put in place to control your spending?
I hate folding clothes, so if I want to buy something new, I will think about whether it is worth folding.
What are some measures you think worked and similarly what has not?
I have not had a problem with overspending on shopping.
Do you think you will stop anytime soon?
No.
Jennifer, 30
Fashion Buyer
What has been a recent item you have been coveting?
Simple fuss-free shoes for everyday, to wear at work.
Please describe your shopping habits.
Impulsive and emotionally driven. I once bought something from a thrift shop my friend owned. I did not even like it but I felt bad for leaving without a purchase. I also once bought a Gucci teapot at a sale.
Why do you think you shop so much?
So many reasons! The main one is that I work in fashion. I also feel pressured to purchase “It” items that are on trend as these items may not come around again after the season is over. I express myself through clothes and find joy in that. Occasionally, I shop when I feel like I am“losing control” elsewhere in life.
What measures have you put in place to control your spending?
Not going to places where I know I will spend money, having a budget or creating a wishlist when I go to a closed-door sale. Creating a mental look book of items I want for the season.
What are some measures you think worked and similarly what has not?
Telling myself “no buying until you get rid of things” sometimes works. The most effective measure is to just not visit physical stores. Online shopping is not as easy, it has a creepy ability to find me at my most vulnerable! Lastly, my hard rule is no to fast fashion.
Do you think you will stop anytime soon?
No, let’s be real. I am hoping to spend my money wiser this year and not give into the “collectable/ could-be-resold” mindset that makes second-hand shopping not as sustainable as advertisers would like you to think.
Dane, 21
Firefighter
Dane’s most recent purchase. Image courtesy of the interviewee.
What has been a recent item you have been coveting?
A pair of Calvin Klein 205W39NYC era boots.
Please describe your shopping habits.
I am influenced by social media and I spend a lot of time consuming fashion and design content. I end up wanting to get everything.
Why do you think you shop so much?
I am a happy victim.
What measures have you put in place to control your spending?
I try to go cold turkey on my phone for a few days. I also instill no social media days because that is how I limit my time with getting on e-commerce platforms.
What are some measures you think worked and similarly what has not?
I have tried affirmations and meditating but they do not work so I just put money away from my main checking account.
Do you think you will stop anytime soon?
I hope so! I want to learn to live with less and be content with stuff I already have. It takes time to undo learned habits. Passion and consumption should not be lumped together.
Online retailers, shopping apps, social media and physical retail… When you are this invested in fashion, the touchpoints for engaging with fashion and shopping are hard to avoid. They are placed conveniently and often within arm’s reach. Social media helps us to stay connected with brands way past the purchase of an item, and influencers and media outlets provide us with a constantly updated list of things to desire. To consume is to participate in a bigger form of material culture, to signal that we are in the know, or to express what we are all about. This makes overconsumption hard to avoid.
Simply having a budget does not work. An additional step to increase the friction of landing at checkout is needed. Some tips I have used include having a separate bank account, creating a wishlist, avoiding places that are conducive to shopping and reflecting on the inconvenience specific to my experience as an aftermath of the purchase. I have personally amassed such a large amount of clothing that I believe I have literally everything I could want or need in my wardrobe. It is time to go shopping in my own quarters.
Till next time!
Best,
MFYG x
The names and details of some individuals have been changed to respect their privacy.